June 16th @ Free Times Café

Gordon’s Acoustic Living Room’s monthly Free Times Café gig is coming up on Sunday June 16. This being Toronto, I realize that there are always lots of other things a person can do on a Sunday night as well. I have been cataloguing the reasons people have not been able to make one of our gigs over the years, and for your information, the top three are: 1) have another commitment; 2) washing my hair; and 3) my hamster died. Interestingly, those were three most popular reasons I was turned down for dates when I was in high school – I guess there are eternal verities after all.

This being our 10th third Sunday in June however, I realize that this gig always runs up against Father’s Day. Father’s Day, as you may know, is a creation of card companies, tie companies and men’s grooming product companies. I suggest you don’t succumb to corporate pressure and instead bring dad to the Free Times.

I can tell you that a number of the dads who are in the band have had their kids come and watch them play – now that is a Father’s Day gift. Gordon’s son (yes there is a Gordon in the Acoustic Living Room – you think we just made the name up?) is much too young to come to the show because doctors recommend that children under the age of six not be exposed to bagpipes. They don’t give any reasons why, it’s just pretty clear that only bad things can come of it.

On the other hand, some of us in the band don’t have kids, so if you would like to be our kid for a day we’d be thrilled if you would come out to the show and pretend to be proud that one of us is your dad. Alternatively, you can act like you’re embarrassed to be there and hide whenever your putative father steps up to the mike or does a solo.

Next year I’ll try to have an ‘Adopt-A-Roomer for a night’ site up before the show so people can choose whose child they would like to be. And we can do special family style seating where all the people who are pretending, for example, to be my kids, can sit together. And then they can make up old grievances that they have against their other pretend siblings and air them at the gig. And then one or two can run out crying halfway through the show. And then I’ll get stuck with the tab because “We only came because Dad plays in the stupid band anyway, why should I have to pay for this too.” And then no one will see each other for a whole year until we do it again next Father’s Day.

On second thought, I think maybe we’ll drop that idea.

In any event, we will be playing on June 16, at the Free Times Café (College and Major, just west of Spadina). As always there will be no cover, the show starts at 8 and there will be lots of great tunes. And please, no crying.

Hope to see you there.